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One of her tights, she throws, is to be gotten to dating her very ladies, so they won't run to spend on men for reporting. If I water hot, I look pretty, there has got be some attractive guy who will pay federal money to get me," functions Oyunga Pala, Cannes columnist and fruity commentator.
Ggirls the gulf between them may not be so deep as it seems. Na which young girl no dey fear hunger? The desire not to go hungry and the desire to taste the good life can easily run side by side. And the fortunes of a woman dependent nuee a sponsor can change in an instant - Dddys for better or worse. She gifls poor by the standards Daaddys middle-class Kenyans, often living hand-to-mouth, dancing for cash Daddy a nightclub, and struggling to put her daughter through school. But nuve determination to feed and educate her child coexists with a naked ambition to become rich and famous through modelling and music. Is she driven more by vanity or poverty, aspiration or desperation? Gils lines are blurred.
Both Grace and Jane have come of age in the last decade, bombarded since childhood with images of female status built on sex appeal. But according to Crystal Simeoni, an expert on gender and economic policy, Kenyan society encourages sugar relationships in other ways too. If women have become more willing to profit financially from their youth and beauty, she says, it's partly because of Kenya's gross economic inequalities, lack of social mobility, and widespread corruption. Hard work won't get them anywhere. The days of waking up early and working from morning to night are behind us, he says: George Paul Meiu, who studies transactional relationships between men of Kenya's Samburu tribe and older European women, has described how their youth and good looks have become valuable commodities in Kenya's beach resorts.
Thanks to a set of "African warrior" stereotypes and myths about tribal sexual prowess, the Samburu and others like them are particularly appealing to both local and foreign sugar mummies. Some Samburu villages, he says, claim they have been unable to defend themselves against cattle raids from neighbouring tribes because so many young men have migrated to the coast to become beach boys. But as most of those dependent on sugar relationships are female, they have dominated the public debate. There are concerns about the morality of their lifestyle, but also about its consequences for their health. Kerubo, a year-old from Kisii in Western Kenya, maintains that she has control of her relationship with her sugar daddy, Alfred.
The pro person on april does not hide the event that these years used their sex advertisement to create opportunities in the first time. But the new between them may not be so give as it seems.
But when I ask her about safe sex, this illusion quickly evaporates. Both Alfred and her other sponsor, James, prefer not to use condoms, she says. In fact she has had unprotected sex with multiple sugar daddies, who then have sex with other women, as well as with their wives, exposing all of these partners to the risk of sexually transmitted diseases. Dr Joyce Wamoyi from the National Institute for Medical Research in Tanzania says girls and young women between the ages of 15 and 24 have consistently been at higher risk of HIV infection than any other section of the population in sub-Saharan Africa. Sugar relationships, she says, are contributing to these risks because the women who engage in them do not have the power to insist on the use of condoms.
Jackie Phamotse, a South African businesswoman who survived an abusive relationship with a "blesser", described her experiences in a tell-all book, Bare: Most young women, she says, are not aware of the dangers. Kenyan academics and NGOs have made extensive studies of domestic violence, and of the risks faced by sex workers. But on the subject of transactional sex there is no research - only the lurid anecdotes of the tabloids. Among Kenyan feminists, the rise of sponsor culture has provoked intense debate. Does the breaking of old taboos around sex represent a form of female empowerment? Or is sponsor culture just another way in which the female body can be auctioned for the pleasure of men?
There is less slut-shaming than before. A lot of times these women don't have a choice - it's life or death. After decades of women struggling for the right to vote, to own land, to go to school, she argues, the "choice" to engage in sugar relationships is steeped in contradiction. Jane, the student, makes a distinction, arguing that "in these relationships, things are done on your terms", and Dr Kirsten Stoebenau, a social scientist who has researched transactional sex in Kenya, agrees that this is significant. Grace, the aspiring singer struggling to put food on the table, has a slightly different perspective - to her the similarities with sex work are more apparent.
Those who deplore sex before marriage and infidelity within marriage rarely practise what they preach, he argues, and the condemnation of sugar relationships is tainted by the same hypocrisy. But it's all a pretence," he says. Even within the family, most Kenyan girls have it drummed into them from an early age that they must marry a rich man, not a poor one. It's taken for granted in these conversations that men will provide the money on which women will survive. So for some it's only a small step to visualising the same transaction outside marriage. Just watching her walk around in a dress is exciting.
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